Author: Brittny

  • Smarter, not harder

    Smarter, not harder

    So I’ve been meaning for a long time to write posts about things that I use in my life to make it easier/cheaper/healthier or in any way better.  I finally have come up with a list of things to write about that’s so long that I could have a weekly post for 3 months before I even had to think again about what I was going to post.  And all of the ideas/products/services on the list are things that I’m so passionate about that if you live with me you know that I live by these things.  So I’ve decided it’s time to get these posts written up and posted.  I’ll try to post one a week until I run out of things to post about.

    I’m calling these posts “Smarter not harder” because it’s one of the mottos that I live my life by – work smarter, not harder!  I feel like there are so many awesome resources out there and we tend to make our lives too complicated.  You’ll probably find that I post about lots of technology-type resources – websites, machines etc – but that’s probably about what you’d expect from me 🙂  I think it’s good to use the resources that are available to us to make all of our mundane daily tasks easier so that we can spend more time focusing on the things that are important.

    I heard a story once that was attributed to Brigham Young.  I hate posting things that I don’t have sources for, but I so liked the principle that I’ve decided to post it anyways with the disclaimer that it’s likely false doctrine  🙂  The story goes that Brigham Young was talking to one of his daughters one night and she asked how the temple work would ever get completed for all of the spirits who had previously passed on.  There were just SO many people to do the work for and she couldn’t conceive of how the Saints would ever find the time to do the work for ALL of them.  Brigham Young allegedly told her that he foresaw a day when there would be many conveniences that would make people’s lives easier so they would have the time to do the work.

    While I don’t always use all of my free time to do temple work, I still feel like by making my tasks in the home easier I open myself up to being able to do service for others, serve in the temple or spend time with my kids.  I almost feel like it’s my responsibility to use these resources so that I’m using my time wisely so that I’m available to do other good things.  It doesn’t benefit anyone for me to do things the hard way and I can benefit many others by doing things in an easier manner 🙂

    Anyways, be on the lookout for future posts on this topic.  I have a few past posts that would go into this category as well if you’d like to whet your appetite:

    P.S. – No, these posts aren’t all going to be gospel centered, so even if you aren’t a member of my church there are going to be posts that you’ll find interesting as well.  In fact, looking at my list I don’t see a single other church related thing on my list.  I won’t ever apologize for bringing things to a gospel tone, but the topics aren’t intended to necessarily be churchy 🙂
  • Thoughts inspired by The Kite Runner

    Thoughts inspired by The Kite Runner

    The Kite Runner

    I just finished listening to The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini.  If you haven’t read it before and you’re someone who enjoys reading I highly recommend it.  It’s an interesting story about a young man who grew up in Afghanistan when the Soviet Union invaded and took control of the country.  He flees with his father to America and returns later during the Taliban rule.  I don’t want to give too many details because I think the fun of reading a book is experiencing it for yourself (ironically this is discussed in the book as a very American attitude).

    Coincidentally I also recently challenged myself to read through the entire Old Testament as it is the one book of scripture that I can’t say I’ve read cover-to-cover.  I’m pretty sure I’ve read almost all of it at one point or another, but I can’t actually say I’ve read every page so I’m working towards that.  I haven’t made it very far and I just read last night most of the story of Abraham (Genesis 15-21).  Reading that story while listening to a book about the unrest in the Middle East and the Muslims there led to some interesting thoughts which I figured I’d write about here.

    One of the first things that struck me is that if Sarah hadn’t given Hagar to Abraham to wife, none of the problems in the Middle East for the past thousands of years would have ever taken place.  Which makes me wonder if the world would have been better off if Sarah hadn’t done that.  The whole feud between Muslims and Jews wouldn’t have existed because there wouldn’t have been any Muslims to begin with.  I’m not trying to say that the world would be better off without Muslims, just that the way that Sarah and Hagar dealt with each other afterwards has created an animosity between those two peoples that has endured through many centuries.  Perhaps under different circumstances Hagar would have married another man within Abraham’s camp, raised those children peacefully alongside Issac and everyone would have lived happily ever after.  I know that’s a big what if and it doesn’t even do any good to speculate on that issue, but I had a different insight that I thought *was* worthwhile to think about.  What if Sarah had kept her faith in God that He would keep His promise to Abraham and herself rather than doubting and giving her handmaiden instead?  Perhaps all of the turmoil that has happened ever since that point could have been avoided by exercising greater faith.

    I’m not necessarily saying that what Sarah did was wrong, perhaps she was even commanded to by the Lord (which was what I had thought originally, but in reading through last night I didn’t see indication of that, please let me know if I just missed it).  I definitely think that it was a HUGE sacrifice on her part to give another woman to her husband to wife.  I’m probably too jealous of a woman to do that myself.  However, it was just a reminder to me to have even greater faith in what the Lord is capable of and allow him to do great things through us.  I think a great example of the converse is Nephi.  When the Lord asked him to build a boat he didn’t ask where he could find a boatmaker, he asked where to find ore to make tools and then let the Lord make him into the boatmaker.  It made me wonder in what ways I’m limiting the Lord’s power to make me into an even better person by accepting things as they are.

    By the way if you’re interested in another book about Abraham and Sarah one of my very favorite books that I’ve read recently is Sarah: Women of Genesis by Orson Scott Card, it was excellent and I recommend it even more so than Kite Runner, but obviously they’re totally different books so it depends on what you enjoy reading 🙂

    The other thought that I had was how much we are all really the same.  If you look at Christians, Muslims and Jews we think of those religions as being SO different.  However, we each branch off at tiny intersections.  Muslims and Jews came from the same spiritual heritage, are both the offspring of Abraham.  They just branch a little bit when Ishmael and Hagar are sent away from Abraham’s camp, but still at the roots and essence of Islam, they believe in basically the same things, and they’re worshiping the same God although by different names and in different ways.  Again Christians and Jews come from the same spiritual heritage all the way up until the birth of Jesus.  Then we differ in that we believe Jesus is the Christ and that He has already come, whereas the Jews are still waiting for the Christ to come.  But again we’re still the same at our roots and worshiping the same God, just in different ways.  I think we can often focus too much on our differences than on our similarities.

    Now, that isn’t to say that the differences that we have aren’t important.  I think one of the things I see most frequently are people who say that we’re all good so don’t worry about how we’re different.  I strongly believe that it is very significant that Jesus is the Christ, that He suffered for our sins and was resurrected and that because of Him we can be forgiven of our sins and live again.  Eric was told by many people on his mission that there are “many roads that lead to the top of the mountain”, meaning it doesn’t matter what you believe we’re all going to end up in the same place.  I do believe that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is the only church on the face of the earth today that has the complete truth.  It’s why we believe in doing missionary work and that it’s so important to spread the truth to others.  What we have *does* matter, and we should be doing all that we can to share it with others.  However, that doesn’t exclude any other religion from having any truth.  Nor does it give Latter-day Saints a monopoly on God, I believe God loves all of His children regardless of race or religion and He will answer the prayers of a Muslim or a Jew or anyone else as readily as a Christian, so long as they’re asking in faith and with righteous desires.  Most importantly I don’t believe that people are simply damned for not accepting the fullness of the gospel in this life.

    What I believe is best expressed in C.S. Lewis’ book The Last Battle (I know, lots of different book references today, what can I say, I love reading ;).  In that book  there is a young man who is a Calormene (i.e. not a Narnian or the equivalent of Christian) and he fights vehemently throughout the book for Tash (the Calormenian god) against Aslan and the Narnians.  At the end of the book **SPOILER ALERT** everyone dies and they have “judgement day”.  When they get to judgement day the Calormenian young man steps aside with Aslan for a little bit and they have a conversation where Aslan basically says – you missed it by a little bit and were fighting for the wrong side, but your intentions were correct, you are a noble and just person and if you will accept this path you still get to come and live in Aslan’s kingdom.

    That’s the best explanation I can think of for how I believe things are going to be on the other side.  Yes, I think it’s absolutely important that Christ is the Savior of mankind and that the pathway to eternal life and exaltation means that we need to accept His atonement in our lives and do those things that will help us return to and become like Heavenly Father.  But if you were a faithful and good person in this life I fully believe that in the next life you’ll be told – you’re awesome, way to be faithful, here are the steps that you need now to gain eternal life and exaltation.  It’s why we do work for the dead in temples.  It’s not to force our faith upon people who have passed on or to tell those people that they were evil.  Quite the contrary, it’s simply to give them the opportunity to accept those things they might not have known before and have the chance to progress onward.

    Which isn’t to say that it isn’t important to accept the gospel in this life if given the chance.  I think one of the most important things to realize about what happens on the other side is that we will still be the same people we are now – just dead.  We won’t suddenly be a completely different person with different desires or abilities.  If you weren’t going to accept the gospel in this life and feel inclined to do those things that the gospel requires, you aren’t likely to do so in the next life. (See Alma 41 for a more eloquent explanation of this)

    Anyways, I know a lot of this is fairly off topic from the book itself but they’re things that I’ve thought about in the past and have meant to write down and post, this just provided a good jumping off point 🙂  As always, you can feel free to add in your two cents below.

  • Vain Repetitions

    Vain Repetitions

    Having a toddler who can speak very well teaches you a lot of things about yourself that you might not have noticed otherwise. Sam has recently brought to my attention, through the things he prays about, that my prayers of late have become rather stale. Not intentionally so, but each night my prayers seem to fall into the same routine. I’m saying thank you for the same things and asking for the same blessings.

    So I’ve tried to add more variation to my prayers.  However, I’ve run into a problem –  I don’t really have anything else to say.  For those of you who aren’t stay-at-home moms let me explain what I mean.  Every day I do pretty much the same thing – wake up, breakfast, entertain kids, lunch, nap time, more entertaining kids, dinner, try to make some family time, bedtime for the kids, teensy bit of time to myself, bedtime for me.  Exciting things in my life include things like trips to the grocery store, a walk to the park or talking to my mom on the phone.  More frequently than not the entire day passes by without me leaving the walls of our home or interacting with anyone aside from Eric or our kids.  So at the end of the day I don’t have a lot of unique things to be grateful for.  I’m grateful for my boys good behavior, for our comfortable circumstances, for the time we had to spend together as a family etc.  Likewise my concerns or things that I’m praying for help with don’t change a lot.  I want Sam to sleep through the night, I pray for my little brother to have success on his mission, I ask for wisdom in how I parent my children etc.

    Now, I’m not saying this as a pity party that my life is pretty boring.  In fact, while I could use more adult interaction, I really do enjoy my life.  Each day may be a lot of the same things over and over, I enjoy what I’m doing and I can’t think of anything that is more important or fulfilling than my current endeavors as a wife and mother.  However, how do I keep from saying the same things in my prayers each day, when each day consists of the same things.  I could stop thanking the Lord for the blessings that I tend to thank him for regularly, or stop praying for the desires which I have, but that seems strange at best.

    So I’ve been doing a lot of thinking, and I’ve come to the conclusion (feel free to put on your false doctrine glasses now, this is the gospel according to Brittny) that my repetitions aren’t a bad thing.  While I think we should always be mindful of new blessings in our life and putting our faith to good use in new ways, I don’t think that negates the need to be grateful for and pray for the routine things in our life.  Even though I make dinner for Eric every single day it doesn’t mean I don’t like it when he thanks me for making a meal.  Sure you could say that he’s already made manifest that he’s grateful for my efforts by thanking me once, and even if he didn’t thank me after a particular meal I wouldn’t necessarily think he was suddenly not grateful for dinner.  However, it’s always nice to hear it anyways.

    I think that’s part of how prayers work.  Even though I’ve already said once that I’m grateful for my sweet little boys that doesn’t mean that I shouldn’t express gratitude for them again the next day.  I’m still grateful for them!  In fact, each day I’m more and more grateful for them, even if I don’t  have different words to express that gratitude with.  And I think Heavenly Father still wants to hear about that gratitude from me.

    More to the point (ok, really really have your false doctrine glasses on now :P) I believe that in large part prayer is more for our sake than for Heavenly Father’s.  I don’t think we’re telling Heavenly Father anything He doesn’t already know when we thank him for the blessings we’ve been given or ask for other blessings.  He can easily enough see how we act and know whether we’re grateful or not, and He can definitely see the things we stand in need of.  I think that a large part of expressing gratitude in our prayers is to help us see the blessings we’ve been given.  I think it is to better help us realize what we’ve been given to help us have a more positive outlook on life and find ways that we can spread the joy and blessings we’ve been given with others.

    Furthermore, I think it’s good to continually pray for the same things.  I think it shows that they truly are important to you and it keeps the things on your own mind.  Plus we’re taught that prayer is a form of work and in many cases it’s the best way that we can help others.  Case in point, each night I pray for my little brother who is out on his mission.  I prayed for him at the beginning of his mission and the things I’m praying for don’t necessarily change all that much, so why bother?  For one thing, it helps me to keep him in my thoughts and finding what I can do to help him.  Even if it just helps remind me that I ought to write him a letter, that’s a positive outcome from praying for him daily.  I also think that it helps him to know that I remember him each night and realize the importance of what he’s doing.  And of course, I think by praying for him each night I’m asking for a renewed portion of the powers of heaven to help him with what he’s doing.

    Recently I read a book by Orson Scott Card called Enchantment. It’s an excellent book that gave me a lot to think about.  The book is a fantasy novel and as such it has different people who possess magical/spiritual powers.  In the book the people of a particular village avoid the name of a particular evil witch because as they use her name more frequently they give her more power.  In another part of the book there is a deity whose power is greatly diminished because the people in his time have forgotten his name.  I think there’s some interesting truth to that principle.  As we call upon the power of God, His power is in some way strengthened.  Not that He had less power before but that we are combining our faith and energies with His power and together those powers are more potent than either one alone.  I think as we pray for the same things over and over we are giving over more of our faith/trust/energy/power or whatever you want to call it over to the Lord and He can make better use of our power than we can ourselves.

    Another reason I think I have difficulties coming up with original material for my prayers is that I try to communicate with God as I come up against different problems or situations.  I’m not always good at stopping, kneeling down and saying a formal prayer, however I frequently will pray in more of a conversation with the Lord.  For example, we have dealt a lot with getting Sam to sleep through the night.  So when I’m trying to come up with what our next steps should be I’ll often just start thinking through the problem and ask the Lord to help me come up with a solution.  Then I’ll try to go through in my mind the process of “studying it out” and consider what things we’ve tried, what I think the problems might be etc.  I try to listen for feedback, if you will, on the ideas and thoughts that I’m having.  Most of the time the answers that I get will just come as ideas that hadn’t been presented to me before or a good/bad feeling as I consider different courses of action.  So while my nightly prayers may not seem original there’s still communication that’s more personalized throughout the day.

    Anyways, maybe this is all just rationalization, but as I’ve considered the stale nature of my prayers lately I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s not as bad as it seems.  I don’t think I ought to artificially change my prayers to have different things that I’m being grateful for or praying for because those are the things that are dearest to my heart.  I think by praying for them continually it is just a way of expressing their importance to me.  I still ought to look for other blessings in my life and places that my faith ought to be applied, however that should be in addition to rather than in lieu of my repetitions.  So long as I am sincere in the things I’m praying for they defy the definition of being “vain” so I’m still in good shape.

    I would love to get other people’s feedback on these ideas.  Like I said, I’m not preaching this as doctrine, just the thoughts I’ve had as I’ve faced a situation in my own life.  Does anyone else have good ideas on how to keep your prayers from becoming rote?  Do you totally disagree and think that repetition is always vain?  I welcome any constructive feedback, positive or otherwise… so long as it’s constructive 🙂

  • The Spirituality of Service

    The Spirituality of Service

    I thought this had been posted already but apparently not.  Well, better late than never!

    This last week Eric and I got to speak in our ward.  Mostly I was excited to have a chance to really introduce our family to the ward since we’re still fairly new.  Unfortunately last week was a pretty busy one for Eric with work and we didn’t really get a chance to work on our talks until Saturday night (Eric’s birthday).  But in the end I think they turned out pretty well.  I figured I’d post my talk here and share some of my insights with other people.  It’s a little rough because of my procrastination but I thought the topic was interesting.  It was a little weird that the topic I was given was just a talk from General Conference.  It both made it really easy to put together, but really difficult to really make the topic my own.  I could have easily just read his talk and had my time limit but it was hard to both stick to what he said and then sorta fill in the gaps or change things around to be what I would want to say.  Not a bad way to go, just an interesting process.  Anyways, here’s the talk I gave (minus the introduction to us, I figure if you want that you can read about how we met here and the rest of what’s going on with us here):

    Our bishop asked me to base my talk off of the remarks of Elder Derek A. Cuthbert from General Conference of April 1990.  His talk was entitled “The Spirituality of Service”, so I will be talking to you today about how serving others can improve our spirituality.  Elder Cuthbert said whenever someone asked him how they could improve their spirituality his answer was to serve more.  Which I thought was an interesting response.  Normally when I think of improving my spirituality I tend to think about things like studying the scriptures, praying, attending the temple and participating in “spiritual” activities.  Service towards others isn’t usually my go-to answer.  Elder Cuthbert broke his talk into 10 aspects of our spirituality that are improved by serving others.  So, I would like to talk briefly about each of those 10 aspects and how we can improve our spirituality through service –

    1) Service helps us establish true values and priorities. If I were to ask most of you here what the most important things are in your lives you would most likely not really talk about things at all, but more likely you’d talk about people.  As we serve others we realize how much more important they are to us than our worldly possessions.  You realize that it’s worth sacrificing a little bit more money for your fast offering so that your neighbor can get through a difficult time.   You would rather spend your time helping your child with their math homework than getting a little bit of overtime at the office.  Your time is spent focusing on those people who are the most important rather than accumulating worldly possessions.  As we are taught in Matthew 6:19-21 – “Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal:
    But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal:
    For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.”
    What greater treasure could we hope to obtain than the relationships we build here on earth with our family and friends?

    2) Service helps us establish a righteous tradition. I think this was one of my favorite points, essentially Elder Cuthbert was saying that as we serve others we set an example that our children will follow in their lives.  I have a good friend who had strayed from the path for a while and had decided against serving a mission.  One night he had a dream where he was much older and talking to his 19 year old son about serving a mission.  In this dream his son asked him why he hadn’t served a mission himself and he had to tell his son that he had been more interested in participating in sinful activities than in serving the Lord.  This was a huge realization for this young man as he had every intention of one day having a family and raising them in the gospel, but he realized that it would be very difficult for him to impress upon his children the importance of things that he hadn’t done himself.

    I’ve noticed in the many wards I’ve lived in over the past few years that there seem to be those families in any given ward that are always there to help, regardless of their church callings or personal circumstances.  I’m sure you know the families that I’m talking about, they’re the ones whose names are on every sign up sheet, whether it’s to help clean the church or bring a casserole to a family or go caroling at Christmas.  They’re usually there at the end of an activity helping clean up, even though it’s not their calling and there’s plenty for them to be doing at home.  What’s most interesting to me is if you ask those people about their service experiences they’ll tell you about their parents that were making casseroles and kicking them out of bed on a Saturday to clean the church and sending them out to sing Christmas carols even when they weren’t in the mood.  Service truly seems to be a tradition that we start within our own homes that our children will see and pass along to their children.  What a truly great legacy that would be to have children who serve others because of our examples!  If we want to teach our children to serve others I believe the only way we will be successful is if we are ourselves are actively out serving.

    3)  Service helps us overcome selfishness and sin. This point reminded me of a story told in General Conference about President Hinckley’s mission.  President Hinckley had reached a difficult point in his mission.  He was discouraged because the work was hard and the people he was trying to teach weren’t receptive.  After sending a letter to his father recounting his difficulties his father wisely sent him back this response, “Dear Gordon, I have your letter… I have only one suggestion: forget yourself and go to work.” While that may seem like a harsh response from a father to a struggling son President Hinckley took his father’s advice and immediately re-pledged himself to serve the people on his mission 100%.  He reported what happened next as follows, “The whole world changed. The fog lifted. The sun began to shine in my life. I had a new interest. I saw the beauty of this land. I saw the greatness of the people. … Everything that has happened to me since that’s been good I can trace to that decision made in that little house.”  He followed with a recommendation for all of us, “You want to be happy? Forget yourself and get lost in this great cause, and bend your efforts to helping people.”  When we are focused only on ourselves and our own worries and problems it doesn’t make us happy.

    The happiest people are not selfish but selfless.  Elder Cuthbert pointed out that all sin stems from selfishness.  Whether the sin is lying, cheating, stealing, immorality, covetousness, or idleness it all stems from putting your own desires ahead of the Lord’s.  Conversely, service is defined by considering someone else before yourself.  Service is one of the best ways to love another person, and I think it should be one of the underlying principles of any successful marriage or family.  I’m certainly not perfect at this, but I try to consider Eric’s needs before my own, and when I do that I am actually happier than I am by thinking about what I want.  Rather than spending my time lamenting that Sam kept me up all night, or that I have a big project for work, or whatever might seem like my most pressing problem, if I focus on trying to help Eric with his concerns then my worries seem less significant because I’m not giving them the time of day.  Plus, Eric is happier because his burdens are lighter, which makes me happy just to see him happy.  And even more so, Eric then has more time and energy to help me conquer my troubles.  If you apply this principle to your marriage your marriage will be happier and the troubles that you might think you are having will not seem as bad as they once were.

    4) Service helps to recompense for sin. I hadn’t really thought of service in these terms before, that when we serve others it is a way of making up for the sins that we have committed.  It makes sense though, if sin stems from our own selfishness, the best way to make up for those sins is through selflessness or service.

    5)  Service helps us generate love and appreciation. To me one of the best examples of service generating appreciation is parenthood.  How many of us never recognized the full amount of effort that our parents dedicated to us until after becoming parents ourselves?  As you serve others I think it gives you a chance to reflect on the service that has been given to you.  Efforts that you might not have even noticed before suddenly seem more significant and you are more grateful for the blessings you’ve been given.

    The other part of this is that serving others helps us to love them.  Most of the people in this ward are fairly new, I think even the “old timers” have been here about 5 years or less.  So if you’re feeling like you don’t know everyone in the ward or that you haven’t yet found your niche, join the club, I’m sure there is not one person here who can name everyone else by name yet.  One of the best ways to get to know people and to really love them is to serve them.  To serve someone you have to figure out what it is that they need and find a way to fill that need.  You absolutely cannot do this without learning something about that person and loving them a little bit more.  Now, you don’t have to go out of your way to do something huge and monumental.  Some of the greatest service that has been rendered to me in this ward has just come from people coming up and saying “hi, I don’t know you” and introducing themselves.  While I can’t say that I remember the names of all of the people who have introduced themselves to me like this, I can tell you that for someone like me who is a little bit shy these simple acts of service have meant the world to me.

    6)  Service is the principal way of showing gratitude to the Savior. Jesus Christ has done everything for us so that we can return to live with Heavenly Father someday.  As King Benjamin put it in Mosiah 2:21
    “I say unto you that if ye should serve him who has created you from the beginning, and is preserving you from day to day, by lending you breath, that ye may live and move and do according to your own will, and even supporting you from one moment to another—I say, if ye should serve him with all your whole souls yet ye would be unprofitable servants.”
    Then skipping to verse 23:
    “And now, in the first place, he hath created you, and granted unto you your lives, for which ye are indebted unto him.
    And secondly, he doth require that ye should do as he hath commanded you; for which if ye do, he doth immediately bless you; and therefore he hath paid you. And ye are still indebted unto him, and are, and will be, forever and ever; therefore, of what have ye to boast?
    And now I ask, can ye say aught of yourselves? I answer you, Nay. Ye cannot say that ye are even as much as the dust of the earth; yet ye were created of the dust of the earth; but behold, it belongeth to him who created you.”

    So, we owe everything we are and have to the Lord.  But there’s nothing He truly needs for himself that we could offer him.  In last April conference Elder Uchtdorf spoke about a beautiful statue of the Savior, which during the bombings of World War II was damaged in such a way that the hands could not be restored.  After some deliberation the citizens of the town where this statue was located decided to leave the statue without hands and put up a plaque that read “You are my hands.”  We may not be able to render service to the Lord directly, but by serving his children we do for Him what He can’t do Himself.  And as we’re taught in Matthew 25:35-40
    “For I was an hungred, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in:
    Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me.
    Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink?
    When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee?
    Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee?
    And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.”
    As we serve those around us we are rendering the only thanks we can give to the Lord and we owe SO much thanks to Him.

    7)  Service channels our desires and energies into righteous activity. We live in very busy times.  We can quickly have all of our time gobbled up by soccer practice, work, chores, TV, internet surfing, parties, church activities, schoolwork, music lessons, and the list goes on and on.  While there are many good pursuits out there, we should find a way to spend some of our time focused on helping others.  The time we spend doing things for others will reward us far greater than time spent in recreational pursuits.

    8)  Service helps us cleanse ourselves and become purified and sanctified. Elder Cuthbert taught that the atoning blood of Christ purges our sins through our Christlike service.  He quoted a prayer he learned in his youth given by Saint Ignatius Loyola
    “To give and not to count the cost;
    To fight and not to heed the wounds; …
    To labor and not ask for any reward
    Save that of knowing that we do Thy will.”

    9)  Service helps us do as the Savior did. As you read about the Savior’s life you will find countless accounts of his service to others.  He went about feeding the multitudes, healing the sick, and giving sight to the blind.  You can hardly turn a page of the accounts of his ministry without reading about the service He selflessly gave to others.  He spent his days among the poorest and most afflicted of mankind lifting them up and helping to make their lives better.  If we want to be like Him then we must also be serving others.

    10) Service helps us to get to know the Savior. In Mosiah 5:13 we read “For how knoweth a man the master whom he has not served, and who is a stranger unto him, and is far from the thoughts and intents of his heart?”  If we want to come to know the Savior then we must be doing as He did.  As you serve others you understand better the love that our Savior has for them, and in turn you understand better the love he has for you.

    In closing, I’d just like to challenge each of you to find an opportunity to serve someone this week.  It doesn’t have to be something big but find a way to do something for someone that will help them. There are lots of ways to serve other people in our daily lives.  I remember during my senior year of college I was talking to my mom once and feeling discouraged that I wasn’t really serving anyone because I was so busy with school and planning a wedding and doing things that were mostly for me.  My mom pointed out that I had my sister over periodically for dinners and was doing a good job helping her through her freshman year of college. It was a small thing, and since my sister is one of my very best friends, not a difficult thing to me, but apparently it had meant enough to her that my mom even recognized that it was an act of service.  I want to encourage you to find people to serve.  They don’t have to be way out of your way, in fact, it’s all the better to serve the people who are *in* your way.  Your neighbors, your sibling, even your spouse!  I promise that if you do this that you will love the person you are serving more and you will feel more loved in return.  It could be as simple as saying hi to someone new, or sending a quick note to a friend who is having a difficult time, or taking over a chore that your spouse would normally do.  I promise that if you will do this that your own burdens will be lightened and your spirituality will be increased.

  • Quiche recipe

    Quiche recipe

    Our neighborhood has a recipe group that meets once a month to exchange recipes and visit.  They come up with a theme and then anyone who wants to participate makes a dish that matches that theme and brings some to sample as well as the recipe.  The theme this month was breakfast foods and I decided it was time to try my hand at making a quiche again.  I don’t really have a recipe, just the vague suggestions from my mom, so I had to write down what I did as I went rather than just copy down a recipe, so it’s a very forgiving recipe.  Unfortunately, I don’t have a printer right now so I couldn’t make up recipe cards to take with me, but I figured I’d do the next best thing and post the recipe on my blog and then just put my blog address next to my quiche.  Then at the last minute Eric wasn’t able to come home in time for me to go anyways.  But since it turned out pretty good and I’d like to have the recipe available for a base next time I try to make quiche I figure I ought to post it anyways. So without further ado, here is my quiche “recipe”:

    Please note, almost all of the measurements are approximate and represent only what I did, not what would yield the best results.  For instance, I have 1 1/2 roma tomatoes… that’s just because I had half a roma tomato in the fridge and decided to use it.  The romano cheese was likewise an addition that was just because I happened to have some lying around.  So feel free to modify as the ingredients in your fridge inspire you!  My mom’s suggestion was to add in some red pepper, which I meant to do but I forgot until after the quiches were already in the oven.

    Quiche à la Brittny

    Ingredients

    • 6 oz frozen broccoli (thawed & drained)
    • 6 oz frozen spinach (thawed & drained)
    • 1/2 large onion diced
    • 1/2 tsp garlic
    • 2 tbsp butter
    • 1/2 tsp Morton’s Nature’s Seasons (or salt & pepper)
    • 9 eggs
    • 1 cup half & half
    • 2 tbsp grated Romano cheese
    • 14 oz grated Monterey Jack cheese
    • 2 pie crusts

    Directions

    1. Preheat oven to 375°F.
    2. In a large fry pan melt butter and sauté butter with onion, garlic and Nature’s Seasons.  When onion starts to brown add in broccoli and spinach until well combined and heated through.  You want to get some of the excess liquid out of the green veggies but not really get them browned or overcooked.
    3. Give a slice of Monterey Jack cheese to Sam so that he remains happy for the duration of the cooking process.
    4. In a separate bowl combine eggs, half and half, romano cheese and Monterey Jack cheese.
    5. Give another slice of cheese to Sam
    6. Roll out pie crusts into two pie pans.  Spoon half of the vegetable mixture into each pie pan to form a layer on the bottom.  Pour egg mixture over top so that it covers the vegetable mixture.
    7. Bake quiches for 30-45 minutes.
  • Christmas Stories Books

    Christmas Stories Books

    As the Christmas season rolled around last year I found myself trying to think of something that I could make or get for friends and family that would be both meaningful and relatively inexpensive.  I decided I didn’t want to stress over making a treat as I lack culinary genius.  As I thought through some Christmas-y things I remembered a Christmas tradition my family had for years.  Many years ago my Grandma Shana made a book with a different Christmas story for each of the days in December leading up to Christmas and gave it to our family.  Every night from December 1 through Christmas Eve we would gather around the Christmas tree in our pajamas and listen to one of these stories and get in the Christmas spirit.  It’s one of my very favorite Christmas traditions and one that I was excited to share with my family.

    I decided to find a similar Christmas book and get it printed.  I figured with the internet it would be really easy to find something like what my grandma had made for us and be done with the project with relatively little effort.  I was right, except I forgot to factor in one small detail – I’m a picky person with gifts I give.  I had a few requirements that none of the books I found could match.  I wanted to avoid copyrighted material as much as possible and focused on Christ and the spirit of giving and family more than presents and Santa Claus.  I was also pretty picky about having a book where all of the fonts/capitalization etc were in the same style and free of spelling errors.  Almost every book I found had at least one story that was photocopied from a newspaper clipping or a magazine, or had stories in completely different fonts, or weird page breaks, or poor spelling.  My last qualification was the one that was completely impossible to meet.  A few years ago Elder Eyring gave a Christmas Devotional talk where he related the story of their nativity play which included Samuel the Lamanite and the events in the Americas.  I really liked the idea of including these events in the nativity play I did with my family and wanted to find a copy of the Christmas story that combined both the events in the New Testament and those in the Book of Mormon.  I found a few renditions that were put into colloquial speech and made into a play script, but I really just wanted to have the scriptures from both stories combined into an easy to read, single story with minimal extra narration.

    So, after failing to find what I was looking for I finally decided to just build it myself.  As Sam would only nap on my lap at the time I moved my rocking chair in front of the TV and hooked my laptop up to the huge monitor and used our wireless keyboard and mouse to work the book while Sam would sleep on my lap.  I don’t remember exactly when I started, but I think it was pretty close to the beginning of December.  It took me right up until Christmas Eve to finish off putting the books together exactly how I wanted them.  But in the end I was very pleased with the results.

    So, since I put so much time and effort into these books I figured I ought to share them with everyone.  I’ve attached the files for both Microsoft Publisher and Adobe PDF for those of you who might not have Publisher.  Feel free to make changes to fit your needs, but please give credit back to me and include the URL to my site somewhere in the book. If you to change the stories that are in your personal collection please note that the table of contents and page numbers are not automatically generated, so you will need to go back and manually update the page numbers at the bottom of the pages as well as the titles and page numbers in the table of contents.  All of the graphics in this book come from Precious Moments’ free clip art collection.  The stories all come from different sources but I tried to list those sources and give credit as much as I could find them.

    You are free to print these and distribute them to your friends as Christmas presents or just print one for your own use.  I printed mine and just put them in 3 ring binders like these ones.  Although if you’re going to do a lot it might be more economical to invest in a comb binding machine and buying a bunch of comb binders and bind them up that way.  I was surprised at how quickly the cost of binders added up!

    I have really put a lot of time and effort into getting this collection to be as close to perfect as I could.  If you notice any errors or have any suggestions for improvements *please* post them in the comments below.

    Christmas Stories – Adobe PDF Format
    Christmas Stories – Microsoft Publisher Format

  • Technology and Gospel Study

    Technology and Gospel Study

    I’m giving a presentation tonight in Relief Society about how we can use technology to enhance our studies of the scriptures.  While preparing for this I came across a TON of awesome resources that I think could benefit anyone trying to get more out of their scripture study, or even just finding time to do it!  So I decided rather than printing off a pretty handout that most people would lose or forget or just throw away I’d post the things I’d found on my blog where not only the sisters in our ward could see them but also anyone else who could use this information.

    Many people say that technology shouldn’t change the way we study the scriptures and that these new things will never replace a good old pen and paper and a hard copy of the scriptures.  They may be right, but in my personal opinion, the way we use the scriptures will be, and ought to be, changed because of the technology we’ve been blessed with.  The church has provided us with countless incredible resources that allow us to make better use of the scriptures than ever before.  Even if you don’t ever intend to abandon your hard copies of the scriptures, you should be aware of the ways you can be using the electronic resources to help you in your scripture study.

    What things can I use to help me with my study of the scriptures?

    The technology that can help us with our scripture study is everywhere and on so many different platforms.  Your computer, cell phone, mp3 players, iPad, Kindle and many many other devices can all help make your scripture study more convenient and meaningful.

    But all of this technology is too expensive!

    It’s true that there are many technologies that are still cost prohibitive.  Kindles, iPads and other eBook readers are still emerging technologies and it will be a few years before they are at a price point that most people can afford.  Similarly while smart phones are becoming more affordable it will still be awhile before they are everywhere.  However, mp3 players can now be found for less than $20!  Most people already have a computer in their homes anyways.  If you have a computer you can make use of most of the resources out there.  Plus, with the exception of one program on this list every single one of the services I list below is absolutely free.  So don’t let perceived price restrictions keep you from making the best use of the resources available!

    What’s a podcast and how do I use it?

    Podcasts are like a radio programs that you can download and listen at any time.  They are updated on a regular basis with new content.  The advantage of a podcast is that you can set up a program like iTunes or Juice to automatically download new episodes when they become available.  You can then listen to the programs on your computer or load them onto an mp3 player so you can listen to them on the go.

    What’s an RSS feed and how do I use it?

    RSS feeds are similar to magazine articles, except in electronic format.  Instead of receiving a physical paper magazine however you will have to use what’s called a “feed reader” to receive the new articles.  My favorite feed reader is Google Reader because it seamlessly integrates with a lot of other services that I use.  To use Google Reader simply create an account with Google and then go to the Google Reader page.  You can then subscribe to feeds you wish to follow by clicking the “Subscribe” button and entering in the URL of the feed you wish to follow.  If you use Firefox you can also click the “add to google reader” button when you are at a feed you wish to follow.  Once you’ve done that you can read any updates to the sites you wish to follow by visiting Google Reader and all of the new articles will be there ready for you to read!

    How do I create my own blog?

    Depending on your level of comfort with computers I would recommend either Blogger or WordPress.  Blogger is extremely simple to use but has limited functionality, whereas WordPress is what this site is built on.  It is extraordinarily powerful and still very simple to use.  All you need to do is go to either one of those sites, create an account, and start writing!  You can then share the link to your new blog with friends, family or whoever you would like.  You can also mark your blog as private so that only you can view the things you write.  It’s totally up to you!

    Study Resources

    These are resources that will help you to study the gospel.  They range from the simple to the complex and everywhere in between.

    • Scriptures online: All of the standard works are available online.  From here you can search the scriptures, read specific chapters, even use it to listen to chapters online!  – http://scriptures.lds.org/ (if you want to see the newer version of the online scriptures you can also see that here – https://beta.lds.org/scriptures?lang=eng)
    • Scripture study helps – http://scriptures.lds.org/en/helps/contents
    • General Conference: All of the general conference talks are available online, now within 4 hours of being broadcast!  You can get the text, audio or video from this website – https://beta.lds.org/general-conference?lang=eng
    • Institute manuals: The Church has provided the manuals for the Institute classes online for you to read.  These are very helpful if you want to gain a deeper understanding of different gospel topics – http://institute.lds.org/courses/
    • BYU Free Independent Study courses: BYU has provided a number of free online classes that you can take, and many of them are scripturally based.  While these won’t get you any credit towards a degree they can help you to have a more structured and deeper study of the scriptures. – http://ce.byu.edu/is/site/courses/personalenrichment.cfm
    • Seminary website: This website contains many great resources for seminary students and their parents, including manuals, study guides, reading charts and even tools to help you learn the scripture masteries! (my mom has been a seminary teacher for the past several years and she is a huge proponent for the method that they use to help learn scripture masteries) – http://seminary.lds.org/
    • Mobile Applications: If you have a mobile phone, iPad, Kindle etc this site will help you find the church created tools to put these technologies to use helping you study your scriptures.  – https://beta.lds.org/tools/mobile-apps?lang=eng
    • Subscriptions: The church puts out many podcasts, RSS feeds and email newsletters that are uplifting and informative.  You can find a full list of them here  – http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?locale=0&vgnextoid=cdd1f9bd8b7d4110VgnVCM100000176f620aRCRD

    Sharing and Note taking Resources

    The best part about reading your scriptures is the cool insights you gain into the gospel.  But once you have those insights what do you do with them?  I personally don’t like marking scriptures with colors because I find it gives me a bias when I’m reading through the next time and I’m more likely to just remember old insights rather than gain new ones.  But everyone has their own style.  Here are some ways you can record and share the insights you gain with different tools.

    • Online markable scriptures: I haven’t used this personally but if you are looking for a way to have an electronic, markable set of scriptures I have seen this site come highly recommended – http://www.dearscriptures.com/
    • Google Documents: One of my friends noted that she uses Google Documents to share thoughts on scriptural topics with her husband.  It helps them have a place to record their thoughts when they have scripture study so they have them for later without making their scriptures messy, and it lets them collaborate on their topics – http://docs.google.com
    • Microsoft OneNote: If you want a great program to help you organize your notes I highly recommend OneNote.  It allows you to create different notebooks with sections for taking notes.  For example you could create a notebook that was called “Doctrine and Covenants” and then inside that notebook have a section for thoughts on Joseph Smith, and another section that had places the pioneers went.  Whatever helps you to keep things organized so you can find them later – http://office.microsoft.com/en-us/onenote/
    • Blogging: My preferred method for taking notes on my scripture study is to post about them in my blog.  It makes it so that I can search for my thoughts later, and share them with other people.  It’s a great missionary tool and it can help other friends have things to ponder on.  My mom and I have had many many conversations about things I have posted in my blog that have helped her with seminary lessons or other things she’s dealing with.  Plus, I get feedback from her, and anyone else who chooses to comment on the things that I write. – http://blogger.com or http://wordpress.com or http://LDSJournal.com
    • Facebook: Similar to writing a blog you could also post your thoughts as a note on Facebook.  Although, my preferred method is to write my thoughts in a blog and then import those blog posts as notes on facebook.  It just gives you another way to share with other people and get their input and insights as well – http://facebook.com
    • Twitter: For those of you who are unfamiliar with twitter it is a relatively stupid service that allows you to post 140 character posts to your friends and the world on whatever topic you choose.  However, as stupid as it is, I really have fun using it.  One of the best uses I have found for twitter is to help me take notes during General Conference.  I like posting the quotes that I found and like with the tag #ldsconf and then follow the #ldsconf tag.  Anyone on twitter who is watching conference and wants to participate in the conversation can follow that tag and add their own input.  One of the really cool things during this last conference was that the #ldsconf tag was trending (meaning it was one of the top 10 topics on twitter at the time) which meant that there  were hundreds of people sharing their thoughts on conference with the world, and members and non-members alike had a chance to see what was being taught by our leaders. – http://twitter.com
    • ScriptureLog for WordPress: This is a plugin that I found for WordPress that allows users to basically install the scriptures on their blog and then make notes as comments that they can share with others.  I really like the concept but it’s not quite what I’d like.  I’m hoping that a future modification will allow for me to make a separate blog post and then just associate that post with the scriptures that I choose.  Someday when I have more time (which is probably not for about 20 years or so) I’d really like to make that modification so that I could use this plugin myself.  It’s really well thought out and very cool. – http://scripturelog.com/download/

    Multimedia Resources

    These are all resources that you can either listen to or watch to help you with your gospel study.  The best part about listening to scriptures and scripture discussions is that you can do it while you do the dishes 🙂

    • Audio scriptures, church magazines etc: The church has a HUGE number of audio programs that are available from their website.  This includes the full version of the scriptures, General Conference, the church magazines, Jesus the Christ, and some church music. – http://lds.org/mp3/newarchive/0,18615,5249-1,00.html
    • The Mormon Channel: There are other uplifting programs that the church produces that are available to stream, download or subscribe to that are played on the Mormon Channel.  – http://radio.lds.org/eng/
    • Scriptures as a Podcast: This is another service I have yet to use myself, but basically you can create your own customizable podcast that will send you the audio version of the scriptures you’d like to study each day so that you can listen to them without having to look them up or find what you’re looking for.  Very cool. – http://www.scripturespodcast.org/Main.asp
    • BYU Broadcasting: Everything that is broadcast on any of the BYU TV or radio channels  is available on their website.  You can download a lot of the programs or watch them online – http://www.byub.org/
    • Mormon Messages: Each week the church creates and posts an inspiring video on YouTube.  I have to be careful when I watch them because I always feel the Spirit and end up crying.  They are incredibly well done and very inspiring.  You can subscribe to their feed in a feed reader so that you see the updates automatically – http://www.youtube.com/user/MormonMessages

    Lesson Preparation Helps

    I’m not going to write something about each of these since they are all pretty similar in what they provide.  There are a lot of lesson ideas, crafts, handouts, art, reading charts, relief society activities, coloring pages, scripture games, fhe lessons… you name it on these websites.  They are incredible resources to have whether you’re a mom or a teacher or just a member of the church 🙂  A word of caution with them though, while they have fantastic lesson plans already put together they should be always used as supplements to your preparation with prayer and study, not as a replacement for the spiritual preparation.

    If you have any other resources that you think I should add to these lists or other information that you think would be helpful for people seeking to use technology to enhance their scripture study please leave me comments below!

  • Visiting Teaching Message – The Sacrament

    Visiting Teaching Message – The Sacrament

    With all the craziness of traveling and being sick this month I once again missed the chance to go see my visiting teachers.  Oops.  Luckily, the end of the month isn’t until tomorrow so I have one last shot to get in touch with my sisters before it’s July.  So, since this coincides with a plethora of brown bananas in my freezer I’ve made those bananas into banana chocolate chip bread (seriously, that’s the best recipe I’ve found for banana bread, you should try it) which is currently in the oven and now I’m working on putting together my thoughts for my sisters right now.  I figured as long as I was doing it I might as well make a blog post out of it so that I can have it later too.

    This month’s message is about the sacrament.  I love this topic because it’s something we do every single week, but sometimes we might miss the importance of what we’re doing.  The most pointed part of the message to me was the scripture in 3 Nephi 18:10, the beginning of the chapter talks about the institution of the sacrament among the Nephites.  After they’ve taken the sacrament for the first time Jesus explains to them what they’ve done –

    And when the Disciples had done this, Jesus said unto them: Blessed are ye for this thing which ye have done, for this is fulfilling my commandments, and this doth witness unto the Father that ye are willing to do that which I have commanded you. (emphasis added)

    I really liked that it says that by taking the sacrament we show that we are willing to keep the commandments.  It doesn’t mean that we will perfectly keep them 100% of the time; in fact that’s the whole point of taking the sacrament every single week.  We won’t be perfect from week to week, but each week we have the chance to sit down and say “I know I’m not perfect, but I want to be and I’m going to work my hardest and try my best to be like Christ in all that I do and say.”  By partaking of the sacrament and accepting the Atonement our shortcomings are made up for.  What a great blessing!

    I’ve heard a lot of people talk about the sacrament as being for things that have already passed.  Like in the Catholic Church where they talk about requiring their “last sacrament” to wipe away any sins that they might have committed since the last time they’d been in church.  I don’t think that’s the way God works.  I can’t imagine that if you were to die suddenly on a Saturday night you’re so much worse off than if you’d died on Sunday right after church – that doesn’t seem like the loving and just Heavenly Father that we have.  Instead I like to think of the sacrament as being a forward facing event.  Repentance and the atonement makes up for our past transgressions, the sacrament is for us to recommit ourselves to doing better in the time we have ahead of us.

    I look at the time while the sacrament is being passed as a chance to re-commit myself to doing everything in my power to be serving the Lord.  My favorite thing to do is to think through the week ahead and find ways that I can be doing the best things.  Whether it’s being more diligent in my scripture study or attending the temple, I try to look through my calendar and task list and find specific ways I can make improvements. Perhaps I should just be sitting and pondering the Atonement, but for me I’ve found it most effective if I can actually find concrete ways to make myself a better person.

    I am so grateful for the Atonement in my life and the way that it makes up for all of my many shortcomings.  I’m grateful for the sacrament and the opportunity it gives me each week to improve myself and to put the Atonement into effect in my life.  I know the gospel of Jesus Christ is true.

  • Marriage/Parenting Advice

    Marriage/Parenting Advice

    There is a young woman in my home stake who asked me for some help with her personal progress. Specifically she wanted help with the project in Divine Nature #2 –

    As a young woman you are blessed with divine feminine qualities. Increase your understanding of and appreciation for womanhood. Read Proverbs 31:10–31 and two talks on womanhood from a conference issue of the Church magazines. Review what “The Family: A Proclamation to the World” (see page 101) says about being a wife and a mother. Then ask your mother or another mother you admire what she thinks are important attributes for being a mother. List the attributes in your journal. Then choose one of those attributes and strive to develop it. After two weeks report your success to a parent or leader.

    So I’ve been pondering for a few weeks about attributes of a good mother. As I thought about it, you can’t be a good mother without being a good wife first, so I’ve somewhat expanded my advice to be things that are both attributes of a good wife and good mother, and some of these things might not fit as “attributes” but more as “things you ought to do”, but I’ll try to get them to fit into attribute categories if I can.

    Anyways, I thought before I sent this on to this young woman that I should post the things here and see if I could get some good feedback on other items I should add or modify before sending it on. After all, one of my best parenting secrets so far has been to ask for help when I need it! I’ve gotten so much good advice from Facebook friends and blog commenters that I’m sure has influenced what I’m posting here, and I’m hoping I might even get a few more good ideas for myself 🙂

    So, without further ado –

    • Put the Lord first – Some people will say that your marriage goes before all else, and this is true for everything except the Lord. As you draw closer to the Lord you will grow closer to your husband and children. Heavenly Father knows better than we do how we should be parenting our children. Find a man who is willing to do the same. Look for a man who is willing to be faithful to the Lord above all else and you know that he will also be faithful to you.I believe this is one of the reasons the church requires all young men to serve missions. It shows their dedication to the Lord and they gain such an incredible amount of experience that helps them in their marriages. They learn to deal with companions, even if they annoy them. They learn how to work hard (and trust me, marriage is hard work!).  They learn how to seek the guidance of the Spirit and follow it. Most importantly, I believe they are blessed in ways you can’t see in their marriages for their faithfulness.  Be willing to make this kind of sacrifice to the Lord, and expect the same in any man who wants to marry you.
    • Obedient – Your children will pick up on things you don’t even realize. Even at one year old I’m FLOORED by the things that Sam picks up on and mimics. If you want your kids to be obedient to you the best thing to show them is how you are obedient to the leaders you say you sustain. If you hear them give you counsel, just do it! Even if it doesn’t make sense to you have faith that the Lord wouldn’t be giving it to us if it wasn’t for our benefit. If you are willing to obey church leaders you will find the blessings of obedience in abundance in your life, and usually you will best understand why they give the counsel they do when you live it. It is such a strong example to your children and it will ALWAYS bless your life.
    • Constructive – Never criticize your spouse or children in mean ways.  Even if it is in joking, don’t call people names or belittle them. This is something I’ve had to work on.  I am sarcastic by nature, but whenever you say something in sarcasm, generally you mean some part of it, and people know that and it hurts.However, this isn’t to say that you need to always be sunshine and rainbows towards others.  One of the things that I learned in institute was the meaning of the word “betimes”.  It means often and immediately.  So when you read in D&C 121:43 – “Reproving betimes with sharpness, when moved upon by the Holy Ghost; and then showing forth afterwards an increase of love toward him whom thou hast reproved, lest he esteem thee to be his enemy; ” it means that we need to correct people quickly, immediately, and clearly.  You don’t do someone any favors by allowing them to continue doing things that hurt others. But it also points out that afterwards you need to show increased love.  Be sure that whenever you point out someone’s shortcomings you do it in the spirit of love because you want to help them, not because you want to tear them down.Also, if you have criticisms of someone tell it to them and not to someone else.  Gossiping doesn’t help anyone.  The person at fault doesn’t know your feelings so they can’t do anything about it and it just makes you feel worse.  However, if you’re going to give praise to someone I believe you should do it where others can hear.  It will build their self-confidence and make them want to be even better. Praise publicly, criticize confidentially
    • Prayerful – Pray to the Lord for your family. In April General Conference just before I married Eric I came into conference with the question of what I needed to do to be a good wife. I listened intently to the speakers for things that I should be doing as a wife and didn’t really come up with anything. Then in the very last talk by President Hinckley he gave this advice – “May there be peace and harmony in your homes. Husbands, love and treasure your wives. They are your most precious possessions. Wives, encourage and pray for your husbands. They need all the help they can get. Parents, treat your children with great kindness. They are the coming generation who will bring honor to your name.” (full text here). It was the most powerful advice I’ve heard. Pray for your husband in everything he does. Whether it’s big things or small things. The Lord is so mindful of our families and children and want the best for them. Pray for guidance with your children. You will need it every single step of the way. Children are such an incredible adventure and most of the time there’s no way you could know what you ought to be doing without the guidance of the Lord. Remember that He loves them more than you do (although as a mother, it’s hard to fathom how that’s even possible) and He is willing and wanting to help you guide them through this life. You absolutely cannot raise your children without His guidance, so seek it out constantly.
    • Consistent – If you say you’ll do it – do it. This was something I was shown is in the scriptures as the way the Lord deals with us (and what better example could we have as parents than our Heavenly Father?). In the book of Mosiah we read about the story of Alma and Abinadi. When Abinadi comes to the people he tells them – if you don’t repent now you will be put into bondage. No one listens to him and he is finally burned at the stake. However, after Abinadi is burned Alma realizes that the words Abinadi spoke were true and is converted. He then goes about preaching the gospel and baptizing and converting others. They get a whole bunch of people together that are now followers of the gospel and they leave. And what happens to them? They’re put in bondage, just like Abinadi said they would be. (see Mosiah 11 – 18, 23-24 for full account)When you read this at first it doesn’t seem fair. I mean, these are the good guys! They’ve repented and got baptized, why are they now put in bondage?!? It’s because they didn’t obey the commandments when they were told to and now they have to suffer the consequences. This is very important to realize when raising kids as well. If you give them instructions and affix a punishment with their failure to comply, if they fail to comply then you need to follow through with that punishment. This is HARD to do. You may have said that they would be grounded for a week, but then they’re really good during that week and there’s a big party that they want to go to that weekend – you need to stand firm. If your kids don’t expect that you will follow through on what you say then they can’t trust you. The other thing to realize with this is to be careful with what you say. Don’t dole out punishments in anger that you don’t really want to follow through on.
    • Peacemaking – Contention can destroy your home. Don’t raise your voice or say unkind things. Don’t fight in front of your kids. Show a united front with your husband, even if you have to wait to answer a child’s question until you have discussed the solution and come to an agreement on a course of action.
    • Treat kids according to their needs – Every child comes in their own way and you can’t expect each of them to have the same needs. When I was in high school I was shy and a bit of a homebody. I was MORE than happy to stay at home on Friday nights with my family and play games and just be with them. So my mom had to encourage me to do the things that were hard for me and encourage me to go out to football games and to parties. On the other hand, my sister Taylor is a self-proclaimed (and rightly so) party in a box. She is outgoing and fun and naturally wanted to be out with friends all the time. My mom had to limit her amount of going out so that she would have time at home with the family. This can apply to everyone, each person you meet will have different needs so be sure to treat them according to those needs.
    • Assume best intentions – Before you get married make sure your spouse isn’t someone that would say mean things or do mean things towards you. So, if you are hurt by something he does or says assume that he doesn’t intend to hurt you and approach him that way. Don’t attack him for missteps he might take, but approach him with kindness and explain why his actions hurt you so that you can work together to fix the problems. I’ve found this to be a good way to approach most situations. Generally, people aren’t going out of their way to do mean things towards you. So if they do something that hurts you approach it calmly and peacefully – attacking the other person only makes things worse.
    • Read scriptures and pray daily – All of the answers that you will need as a parent, spouse and person are in the scriptures and available as we have the Holy Ghost with us. Be sure you are always in a position to feel His promptings and obey them.
    • Bear testimony often – Find ways to teach your children through everything you do. Make sure they see you supporting church leaders, paying your tithing, saying your prayers, going to church, reading the scriptures, attending the temple etc. It will be a vital part of their own testimony. Teach them the principles of the gospel as you come across any situation that presents itself.
    • Humble – Realize that you don’t know everything. There are so many people around us who want to help you be successful. Listen to their guidance and try to act on it.
    • Remember and keep covenants – Don’t settle for less than a temple marriage, it’s not worth it. Children have a right to be born into a family that has been sealed together forever. The covenants that you will make in the temple will strengthen you against all the evils in the world and help you become the best you can be. I can’t imagine trying to be a mother without the protection and guidance I have received through my temple covenants.  Marriage and parenthood is hard enough even with these blessings, you deserve nothing less than marriage in the temple to a young man who is worthy to take you there.
    • Forgiving – Be willing to apologize and forgive quickly, especially with your kids. If you realize you are in the wrong don’t just try to hide it, apologize and let them know it. You will gain their respect and trust as you show them how to apologize and forgive.
    • Patient – Motherhood requires immense patience. Your kids will undo all of your housekeeping the moment you do it. Everything you will want to do will take twice as long just by taking your kids along. You will even need patience just to keep from decking the lady at church who states that she “can’t understand parents who can’t get their kids to sleep through the night, just put them to bed and let them sleep!” when your own 14-month old *still* won’t sleep through the night… or anything like unto through the night (not that this happened to me… last week… at church :P).
  • Paying Tithing Online

    Paying Tithing Online

    If you’re like me then you have no doubt run into problems with remembering to pay your tithing when money comes in. It’s not that I don’t like paying tithing, or that I’m being grudging about it, I’m just not used to having to write checks. Tithing is pretty much the only check I write so I don’t carry around a checkbook. Plus, since Eric and I have been married at least one of us has had a variable paycheck so each month if we *do* remember the checkbook we still have to figure out how much we owe.  If we’ve left paystubs at home or forgotten when we paid last sometimes the math is too complex to figure out in sacrament meeting, and then another week goes by with our tithing unpaid.  Not good.

    So, I decided to do some research and find out if there’s a way for me to pay my tithing online. I figure everything else gets paid online, why not tithing? It would make the difference between our tithing getting paid immediately when we receive income or when the stars aligned so that we knew how much we owed and had a pen, checkbook and tithing slip in sacrament meeting. The Church is fairly technically savvy so this didn’t seem like too much of a stretch that I would be the only person looking for this.

    Lo, and behold! There is a way to pay your tithing electronically! If your bank supports a bill pay option you can set up your bill pay to send tithing payments to the church. I found this article that gave really good instructions. The links in the article were outdated but I was able to find the form that he mentions here and the electronic donations page here (although the form is really all you need).  I recommend reading through his whole article for the complete instructions.  He even gives good tips to get all the paperwork electronically if you are paper averse (like Eric and I are :P). Also, if you’re interested there is some interesting discussion on the subject on the LDS Tech forums (apparently elsewhere in the world tithing is *only* accepted electronically).

    There are a couple important things to note about paying your tithing online

    1. Your tithing will not show up on your end of the year report in your ward when you go in for tithing settlement, but you will receive a year end report from the church of what you have donated.
    2. Your fast offerings will not go into your ward’s fast offering account but instead into the general church fast offering fund. If you want it to go into your ward’s specific fast offering account you’ll need to still write a physical check.
    3. Similarly you cannot contribute to the ward’s mission fund or to a specific missionary’s fund via online bill pay – you’ll have to do that manually as well. However, you can make donations to the general missionary fund.

    The one thing you won’t find in the article is how to set up bill pay with your individual bank.  You’ll need to log in to your bank’s website and determine if they support this functionality and find documentation on how to use it.

    • If you bank with USAA – we do and we LOVE them – they support free bill pay if you have a checking account. You can find their instructions on how to set up bill pay here.
    • If you bank with Deseret First Credit Union (which my family does, which is the only reason I’m including it here 😛 ), they also support bill pay for free *if* you use it at least once a month. I didn’t realize there was that caveat when I first signed up for it, and since I didn’t have any bills that I needed to pay online… I got charged $3ish each month that I had it. But if you’re using it to at least pay tithing, that shouldn’t be an issue. You can find instructions for Deseret First here.
    • If anyone finds instructions for setting up bill pay with other financial institutions please feel free to leave a link to them in the comments!

    I hope someone else finds this information as useful as I did! Hopefully it will be even easier than it is now in the future, but the overall process wasn’t too bad, and I’m so excited to not worry anymore about whether we’re current in paying our tithing.

    HUGE thanks to Russell Sperry for his very helpful article. All of my research started from there and I’m so grateful for him sharing his knowledge.

    Also, another big thanks to Amber Fife for allowing me to use her picture at the top of this post. She posted it on Facebook and I thought it was an inspired picture. Contact her if you are interested in a larger format or prints!

  • Revelation

    Revelation

    Unfortunately I wasn’t able to go visit one of the sisters I visit teach this month because she got strep 🙁  But I promised her that I would at least email her the lesson and some thoughts if I couldn’t get to visit her this month.  I figured so long as I was doing it I might as well post it as a blog post too.  So here it is…

    The lesson for April is on personal revelation.  I was really excited about it because it’s something that has been on my mind recently.  I’ve had a couple of interesting experiences in the past month that I wanted to share in conjunction with this topic.  I’ve found a few different ways that the Lord answers our prayers through these experiences.

    Last week I had sent Sam over to my sister’s house for a few hours while I worked on some urgent projects for work.  When I had completed my work I had a little bit of extra time so I decided to take advantage of it by listening to some of the talks from the most recent General Conference while I did some cleaning.  I was listening to Elder Eyring’s talk I had the thought pop into my head that I needed to email my little brother’s friend, Ashley, and see if she needed help with her personal progress. Ashley isn’t a member of the church because her parents won’t allow her to get baptized until she is 18. She’s been investigating the church for about two years now and it’s been really neat to see her testimony growing. I’d been noticing on facebook as she’s been posting about trying to complete her personal progress. That’s a pretty big project to take on and it took me all 6 years in Young Women’s to complete it all, so for her to try to take it on in the past little while was pretty impressive to me.

    However, I don’t know Ashley that well. I’ve met her a couple times when I’ve gone home for holidays, and we’re facebook friends, but that’s about the extent of it. I felt kinda weird asking out of the blue if she wanted help with her personal progress. But I remembered something that Amanda England told us once about her attitude towards inspiration. She says whenever she’s trying to decide if something is inspiration or just her own thought she asks herself, “is it a good thing to do?” If the answer to that question is yes then she’s decided that it doesn’t matter if it’s inspiration or herself, and she does it. I liked that, so since I decided that offering to help a young woman with personal progress was a good thing to do, I acted on it and sent that email. I’m SO glad that I did. That night I got an email back from Ashley saying that she’d been looking for someone to help her with her personal progress and praying that someone would step forward. She doesn’t come from a great family environment and needed someone who could help her with the goals that require you to talk to a woman about characteristics that are valuable in a wife and mother. What a blessing! I felt so good to be needed and that I decided to act rather than wait.

    I had another experience with a completely different matter. Eric and I have been making some serious considerations as to our plans for the future. As we’ve been doing so it’s obviously been a subject in our prayers and we definitely are seeking the will of the Lord in our actions. A couple weeks ago I was working on our laundry while Sam was at my sister’s (again, hmm, there seems to be a pattern here!). While I was doing so I was thinking about these decisions and trying to study them out in my mind. The thought came to me that while the house was quiet and I had some time to myself that I needed to kneel down and pray and pour out my soul to the Lord on the things we’ve been considering. So, I did. Not five minutes later I received an IM from Eric about a situation that had come up (probably in the time that I was kneeling and praying) that directly related to what we had been considering. I don’t know if that situation would have come up the same way, or if we would have dealt with it in the same way if I hadn’t just been praying before it happened. The experience didn’t directly answer our prayers but it helped us decide what path we ought to pursue and I was so grateful for that guidance.

    So far I’ve just shared a couple of experiences but what I really want to share is what I learned from them.

    1. Apparently Sam is a detriment to my ability to receive revelation. Just kidding! Although, the fact is that both of these experiences happened when I didn’t have him around. I think the real message for me was that I need to seek out quiet time to ponder on things if I want to receive revelation. It’s much easier to hear the still small voice if we’re taking the time to be still and listen.
    2. When you receive revelation – act on it! Don’t worry too much about whether it’s really from the Lord or from yourself. My mom was at a fireside with Elder Bednar last week and someone asked him how to know when she was receiving answers to prayers. His answer was to stop asking and start doing. He told the girl asking the question that if she was asking the Lord sincerely for guidance and trying to follow the guidance she got, the He would not let her go astray. Once we’ve finished praying our job is to get on our feet and start moving in a direction, and if it’s the wrong direction, we’ll be stopped and guided in the right direction. I know I’ve found this so many times in my life that I don’t receive answers to my prayers as thoughts or feelings while I’m praying, but that I’m directed in my actions as I get up and go to work.
    3. The Lord loves us and is mindful of the things that are important to us.  I think this is what impressed me most of all is however big or small our problems are the Lord finds ways to help us through them.  Because Ashley prayed I was able to receive revelation to help her with her personal progress.  Because I prayed, the situation with Eric became a little guide to us in our decision making process, rather than a frustration.

    I loved the quotes in this month’s message so I wanted to share a couple of them.

    “We prepare to receive personal revelation as the prophets do, by studying the scriptures, fasting, praying, and building faith. Faith is the key. Remember Joseph’s preparation for the First Vision:
    “‘If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God. …
    “‘But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering.’”
    Elder Robert D. Hales of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles.

    I liked how Elder Hales points out that the way we gain personal revelation is the same process that the prophets do.  We have access to the same powers and guidance that President Monson has, if we are willing to put the work in on our end to study and ask and then listen and do.

    “Prayer is your personal key to heaven. The lock is on your side of the veil.
    “But that is not all. To one who thought that revelation would flow without effort, the Lord said:
    “‘You have not understood; you have supposed that I would give it unto you, when you took no thought save it was to ask me.
    “‘But, behold, I say unto you, that you must study it out in your mind; then you must ask me if it be right, and if it is right I will cause that your bosom shall burn within you; therefore, you shall feel that it is right.’”2
    President Boyd K. Packer, President of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles.

    I liked this quote because it points out very clearly that we need to be the ones to seek revelation.  The Lord can’t help us unless we’re willing to come to Him.  Even though He knows the desires of our heart He has given us free agency to choose to accept His help and guidance or decide to do it on our own.

    “In its more familiar forms, revelation or inspiration comes by means of words or thoughts communicated to the mind (see Enos 1:10; D&C 8:2–3), by sudden enlightenment (see D&C 6:14–15), by positive or negative feelings about proposed courses of action, or even by inspiring performances, as in the performing arts. As President Boyd K. Packer, … President of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, has stated, ‘Inspiration comes more as a feeling than as a sound.’”3
    Elder Dallin H. Oaks of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles.

    I liked how Elder Oaks illustrates some of the different ways we receive revelation.  I know for me it comes in different ways at different times depending on what I have my mind opened to.  At times I have a hard time always trusting my feelings, but later I’ve found that in many cases those feelings were leading me in the right way all along.  I need to learn better to trust those feelings rather than putting too much stock in logical decision making processes.

    “The temple is a house of learning. Much of the instruction imparted in the temple is symbolic and learned by the Spirit. This means we are taught from on high. … Our understanding of the meaning of the ordinances and covenants will increase as we return to the temple often with the attitude of learning and contemplating the eternal truths taught. … Let us enjoy the spiritual strength and the revelation we receive as we attend the temple regularly.”4
    Silvia H. Allred, first counselor in the Relief Society general presidency.

    Sister Allred’s quote might have been my favorite.  I think this is something I overlook too often.  We are so blessed to live so close to so many temples.  But somehow it’s still always hard to make the time to go.  You have to block out a chunk of time, find a babysitter, get dressed up and not let anything get in the way.  And something ALWAYS tries to get in the way 😛  But I know that when you go to the temple with a prayer in your heart the Lord will help you find your answers.

    Sorry this is so long, apparently I had a lot on my mind on this subject.

  • And it was good

    And it was good

    In Relief Society we were talking about the Creation on Sunday.  I had a thought that I wanted to share.  At the end of each day God surveys his works and declares them good.  I think that’s a good pattern for how we should live our days.  At the end of the day we should think through the things we’ve done and see if we can declare them “good”.  We don’t have to have done something spectacular like separate the land from the seas or create all the animals, just if the things that we are doing in our sphere can be considered good.  Are you doing the things that would make you the kind of person you would like to become?  Are you proud of the way you treated those you came across?  Are you taking care of the things within your stewardship?  I think it gives us the opportunity to find ways to improve ourselves each day and to realize where we are headed.

    So, when you’re going to bed tonight think – what have I done today?  Have I done good?

    (and no Taylor, that’s not a grammatical error.  I want to know if you have done good (things), not whether you were well today 😉 )